That is the first thing that comes to mind when I hear the name Robin Williams. I don't really know why it just is. It is by far not my favorite film of his, that would be Dead Poets Society. Mr. Williams is probably my all time favorite comedic actor. I remember the days of Mork and Mindy fondly. Nannoo Nannoo. The reports that his death is due to an apparent suicide are saddening. Why does someone who has so much choose to end his or her own life, is something we hear a lot of in situations like this. But did he really have all that much? Sure he probably was well off monetarily but obviously there was something missing from his life. We will probably never know for sure what that was but we do know that he was dealing with depression.
Depression is a terrible thing. I know, I am dealing with it now. Feelings of inadequacy, feelings of uselessness, feelings that I am not good enough, and so on. I think we all have these feelings at different times and at differing degrees. According to WebMD and estimated 19 million American adults struggle with major depression. Statistically speaking, you probably talked to someone today that is dealing with depression.
To go back to what I said about something being missing. What do you think that thing is? As many of you know I am a man of faith. I have a strong faith in God. Do I always rely on it like I should? To be blunt, absolutely not. I believe that as a Christian my faith is tested every day. Satan is constantly bombarding me with temptations, doubts, and other things to get me to question that faith. I am in a spiritual battle. We all are. We are all creations of the one Creator. In that creation we were made in His image. We were made by Him for Him. In His infinite wisdom he gave us the blessing of free will. (some days I think it is a curse) The one thing that I think is missing in many peoples' lives is a personal relationship with God and His son Jesus Christ.
I know it has been quite awhile since I blogged, for many reasons, but this week I was having a conversation with a good friend of mine about some personal battles I am dealing with and he said I needed to start writing again. I agreed but wasn't really motivated to do it. Then tonight I read the news of Williams passing. I decided that writing good be good therapy tonight so I sat down at my computer and began to type. I realize I am rambling a bit but here is what I am getting at. You need to have a personal relationship with your Creator!
See, when you have a personal relationship with God you are never alone. If you believe in Jesus Christ, confess your sins, repent of those sins, and accept Him as your Lord and Savior you receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. That gift is priceless. In Romans 8:26 we are told "In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness..." Depression is a weakness. I don't have to deal with that alone. I may not know what I need, or even exactly what the underlying issue is but because of my personal relationship and that gift of the Holy Spirit I can reach out to God in prayer through the Spirit and as the verse continues "We do not know what we out to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express." I find it awesome that even though my feeble mind can't always make sense of a situation I can go to God in prayer and He will answer me.
Do I have all the answers? No. I am in no ways a biblical scholar or an expert. I am just a simple man struggling each and every day to be the man God wants me to be. I am not perfect and most days lately have been failures by me to do my part in this relationship. But, as with any relationship, you have to work at it. So I will continue to work at strengthening my relationship with God and with His help I will battle the issues that I am faced with and I will survive and be stronger for it. But it will be because of Him, not me.
In closing, Romans 8 finishes with a powerful couple of verses (38 & 39) "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, not anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
I love you big brother! I am sorry that you are having to go through this battle. You are absolutely not alone in this. God is pursuing you, loves you and is for you. Keep trusting the Story. AND you have a ton of people who love you and care about you. On the hard days, ask for help. Even when it is hard and I know it is. I'm praying for you and am only one phone call away.
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